1a

my lungs burn, my chest & back feel like they are on fire. So does my stomach now that i think of it. u know, u may have to decode my writing ;) so i feel dizzy & tired all the time bust mostly bc i cant breathe. allergies :( summer will be better. I do best in the heat, no wind, no cold, dry not moist air. no smog!!! brown air just sucks! the bad part of OC (but the weather is good & the beaches are great - for the main land anyway ;) allergies & my stomach hurts from my gall bladder tat needs to come out ;( i have no money or insurance so i am suffering thru the pain and hoping to get the lazer surgery so i dont have to lose my organ ;( but that takes money - medicare doesnt pay for that. if you have money you can buy clean water, clean food, and better medical care for yourself. I have nothing. Monetary that is ;) I have no job, no support but I get to live with my kids in their room at their dads ;) & he is helping me by letting me use his internet here at home. I guess that is my support ;) I am in temporary & close quarters (6 people a dog and a cousin from time to time ;) in a 2 bedroom apartment ~ yikes) I have learned to give up a lot and I prayed 15 yrs ago for this (funny i lived right down the st. ;) I just wanted to be like qui chang caine and travel the world in a robe and sandals ;) doing God's work each day helping someone, learning something, teaching something - free of all that societies put on us ;) nice huh. I am pretty much there ;) I am proud to say my daughter got to go to the mall with my mom the other day for her 9th birthday. My kids have been to DLand more than "The Mall". They have only been to a Mall a handful of times in their lives (and they are 15, 13, 9 & 7).

I get to drive a car when I need it but have not been able to pay for it all year. Food & rent have come from God the last 3 yrs and the last yr i have been a single mom. I gave up all my "space" my privacy but i am learning to not let satan rob me of my joy ;) priceless!

I think I will post some old writing - just since i have not reread it in a few yrs ;)

JennX Jennifer Lesko Gender: Female Status: In a Relationship W/God Sign: Aquarius City: Born & Raised in La La Land & OC ;) State: California Country: US My Subscriptions Dominick Paranoids Meat Puppets PAT TODD & THE RANKOUTSIDERS moby The Offspring The Muffs KCRW Justice For Kurt DEVO Don Sarah Silverman The Fleshtones Revolution NYC The Sonics The Jack Brewer Reunion Band Vaccine

I really think JFK. Jr. was one of my "modern day hero's"