Why? Why me? Why can't I have some totally uneventful life somewhere? Simple you know. I have asked that question my whole life. So in my quest for peace I have always wanted to walk the world and be free of any possessions, just all I need in a sack all qui chang and this mold is giving me that perfect chance ;) Free of all my worldly objects just me and God on our journey thru life ;) I feel less stressed that way ;) each day God leads me and guides me and directs. I call out to Him for that, and he responds. I work here and there and I take care of my kids I like to Homeschool so I do that and God provides the way. I need to learn to focus on the good to come and I am stoked to plan more at church which is what i prayed for too. I pray and God provides. I am very hard on myself and others bc I know we are capable and like a good trainer, u hv to kick some ass. Well, I am loving too ;) Doing it God's way makes me happy. Not having sex before I am married makes me happy. Not drinking and smoking makes me happy and my bible study makes me happy. All that I want I have. All that I need I have. And I love working a bit each day on what I want the next 10 years plus to look like. I want peace and happiness and I know that is a state of mind not where I live or what I drive, etc. That is what my heart yearns to do and where to be. All year it has been me and God. Just that. No guy, no bills, no job, kids in school all day and daycare after school. I worked many jobs and saw myself stronger than I ever have. I saw my fears and my needs and watched God conquer each one. I had many sorrows but happy to sob. But what has not changed in the last decade or two is the need for change.
Mass amounts of pain. Increase in cancer, war, violence and poverty. All this breeds self destruction and children are raised like animals.
This is in America. I am so happy we go to other nations and help africa in crisis but i donot understand why americans ignore the truth ;(
We glorify greed and corruption wins. We are a sick nation in need of care. We hide behind hollywood and what is the norm and i have to watch kids get botox & breast implants? How sad. For every boob job to please a guy I pray a girl becomes a Warrior for God. Sad to see that we as a nation think thin, under weight no muscles and plastic parts are to exemplify ;(
Being the weight your weight category says for your height obtained from healthy foods and daily work outs is the way God wants us to be. Strong, fit, healthy. One hour a day every day My Naturalpathic Doctor said to stay fit. Get your heart rate up and move, dance, thai chi, kick boxing, ballet, lift weights, take a hike up a mountain, play tennis, snow ski, etc. I do more but these are the tops I like to mix it up ;) I also had a great trainer (3 really ;) when I worked more and had the bills. That was grand. I really got into that but I like my gym and classes too but i work out at home and outside a lot too (I can focus better ;)
I eat fruit and veggies and i love high fiber whole wheat & brown rice. I love my flax protein fresh berry smoothies ;) God has put the best trainers in my life and Gilad was my first ;) Love his style ;) I eat a lot of fresh fruit and drink mostly water and tea i love coffee but rather not drink it so i cut way back. i eat junk and sweets here and there but as long as i work out it is my treats or rewards it is bc i work out that i get to enjoy in moderation so i never say i cant eat this or that. i chose to eat what i want and if i get sick from it i dont eat it (very much ;)
I think I will just walk away from my goods and not try to play house maybe i just need to travel and see the world. I know bc i get scared that i should do it ;) i know that is what i want to fully trust God and I am learning by doing. And facing my fears. God helps. I pray for clarity, wisdom, guidance and strength and above all to serve Him only.
So i think i try to be odd to get peoples attention but really i rather not so ...it is odd but I just call that ~ God ;)
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